| This little piece of
ass was written on Wednesday, Aug. 20, 2003 at around 3:05 p.m. |
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Barbie makes me horny. |
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From Suzanne: Should I make more Barbie Porn this week? BTW you Assclowns are the coolest.
 Assclowns say: Do you even need to ask? OF COURSE YOU SHOULD. And make sure you send it to all the children you can find.
Yes, we know.
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| This little piece of
ass was written on Wednesday, Aug. 20, 2003 at around 3:00 p.m. |
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Hick lovin' is a good thing. How else do you think the south reproduces? |
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From Sandy: Okay my nephew just recently started hitting on me. I dont want to sound mean by telling him to just fuck off, but I want him to stop it. It's disgusting, he's like 17 and I'm in my 40's! He even tried to hump my leg the other day like a diseased dog. Please help me get that little assclown to stop it!
Assclowns say: Ok let me get this straight, he's 17 and you are in your 40's and you want this to stop? WHY? I say fuck his young tender ass just don't have kids or they will be bigger dumbasses then you are. You're old, you aren't gonna get any better go for it before you die of old age. Just be thankful he has very bad taste and likes old wrinkly pussy and his own DNA. GO FOR IT.
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| This little piece of
ass was written on Wednesday, Aug. 20, 2003 at around 2:58 p.m. |
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KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT! |
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From Luke: I'm confused on a lotta things. What is the sky blue? Why is the grass green? Why will no one have sex with me? Why am I such a loser? Why do people make fun of me for shopping at K-Mart? Should I get my foreskin pierced? How far is too far? Is the glass half full or half empty? Why does the cyote spend all that money on machines to catch the road runner when he could just go to the store and buy food? Why do we drive on a park way and park on a drive way? Why is "Arkansas" spelled like Ar Kansas? How far is too far? And why do I have so many questions????
Assclowns say: Why would God allow such a hideous mistake of a human being such as yourself to ever be born?
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| This little piece of
ass was written on Tuesday, Aug. 19, 2003 at around 3:54 p.m. |
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You taco smelling bastards. |
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From Pablo: Why does everyone look down upon us latinos? is it because of the rest of our family that sneaks over the border and runs around the states illegal and hitting on young teen girls at Wal*Mart?
Assclowns say: No, it's because you smell like tacos and burritos and when we smell you it makes us hungry and pissed off we can't get any good Mexican food out here unless we want to go south of the border and then get diahrreah for a week.
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| This little piece of
ass was written on Tuesday, Aug. 19, 2003 at around 3:52 p.m. |
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It depends on what those damn hippies eat whether it will smell bad or not. |
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From Alison: Hi, I like to play with ham. It's the best thing in the world to play with because it sticks and molds to stuff. I made a life-size man out of about 100 pounds of ham once. Okay, my problem about playing with ham is that it's getting expensive where I live and I need a new deli-meat to play with. I can't use bologna because I can't stand the smell. What type of meat should I use instead of ham?
Assclowns say: You could build it out of American human feces. That's meat to Mexican's! Our shit could feed a familia of 4 there! And here it's free so build away mi amigo, build away.
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| This little piece of
ass was written on Saturday, Aug. 16, 2003 at around 5:07 p.m. |
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Carnies need to eat too! |
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From Sway: What is your opinion on steamed cabbage?
Assclowns say: It supplies carnies with their vitamins. And if they don't feel good how will we ever have fun riding their wonderful rides and making fun of them at the same time?
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| This little piece of
ass was written on Saturday, Aug. 16, 2003 at around 5:06 p.m. |
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Maybe Ronald McDonald would be willing to bang you |
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From Molly: Hey I am sexually attracted to clowns and my husband wont dress up like one in bed what should I do? PS not male strippers do clown outfits.
Assclowns say: Stop giving up the goods until he obliges your innocent, albeit fucking weird, request.
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| This little piece of
ass was written on Saturday, Aug. 16, 2003 at around 5:04 p.m. |
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In other words, stupid ass mother fuckers |
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From Pengin: Hey. I'm back! Did ya miss me?! Anyway, I wanted to know YOUR definition of the word "Assclown."
Assclowns say: Assclown: A person or other living creature that makes chronically horrible life decisions and rather than take responsibility for and learn from said horrible life decisions, they act like total and complete ignoramuses, thus causing the rest of the world a great deal of mental and emotional, and sometimes physical, anguish.
Back That Thang Up *
Do Me In The Butt |
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Spankin' New+
Old
Ass+
Assbook+
Assmap+Ass Layout+Ass Behind the Assclowns+Diarrhealand |
Disclaimer: You ask, I answer. It's that simple.
If I hurt your feelings, I really don't care.
It won't do any good to sue me because I have no money anyway.
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